Second Month of Teaching

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• Second Month of Teaching
    Trying to actually teach things is hard
  After a month of training I thought I could teach really well, then I sat and waited at my previous employer for a while (about a month) waiting to be placed and so I didn’t practice a whole lot, and now that I’m back in the swing of things I have to remember how to teach again
   I think kids for the most part get it, I’m still doing the whole 3 step approach of TFA lore (Introduction to New Material, Guided Practice, Independent Practice) but the thing is that introducing new English terms to these children is like trying to teach a 3-year old how to swim
  You teach the 3-year old exactly where to put his arms and legs, how to move his arms and legs, but every time you put him in the pool he just drops like a rock
  Not all of my students are like that
  I would say 80-85% of my kids get it, then I have about 15-20% of kids who just want to read bad Chinese anime through my class
  At least I make those students cry
  The taking of book bags is extremely effective
  I have got to say, I’m so proud of myself for thinking of this
  I can’t speak Chinese that well, so if I criticize a child he or she is just going to laugh or not understand and if I send them to the home teacher, they’re not going to respect me as a disciplinarian
  So if I take their book bag as a punishment for getting 3 strikes (not sitting properly, talking out of turn, and so forth) their parents must come to my office to retrieve their book bag
  Oh man so many kids cry but I tell them every day, if you misbehave 3 times in my class your parents have to come to see me if you want your book bag, and they don’t believe me until I actually walk out of the room with their book bag, and that’s when reality rears its ugly head
   I feel kind of bad because I make students cry sometimes, but then I remember that one of my students gave me a decapitated teddy bear eraser, so I know they’re empathy isn’t quite as deep as the ocean
   The lies these kids tell to try and get their book bags back are priceless
  One student, who misbehaves in a lot of teachers’ classes, first told me that his parents’ were dead, then when I asked if he had any other head of household told me his entire family was dead (which at that point I knew he was lying), then when I asked him if his entire family is dead, how come his brother came to school today, he literally said, “Oh, he’s only kind of dead”
  
  
   Then I asked for his parents’ phone number, he got his lies mixed up because he said, “I don’t remember it, they just bought it today” to which I replied, “So you’re dead parents bought a cell phone today?” to which he replied, “They’re going to beat me”
  
  
  That’s when another teacher chimed in, “They should!”
  
  
  That child stayed in my office until 6:30 pm (school got out at 4:05 pm) so when his father finally came to school wondering what had happened to his child, you can imagine how mad he was
  Then there was another child who enlisted the help of his buddies to try and get his book bag back
  
  
  The thing is that it would have worked if one kid wasn’t trying to top another kid’s lies (because they're 3rd graders)
  
  
  First they said he was from very far away (think of a place 30 miles away from a school) which didn’t sound right seeing that I taught at a public school, then they said he did live nearby but his mom and dad work 20 hours a day so they can’t come in to get his bag, then about 10 minutes after they said that his mom walks into my office and scolds that little child
  
  
  Then we had mid-terms which went extremely awesome
  Because I’m an oral English teacher, I have no grades, homework, or tests (imagine the work involved in trying to individually grade 750 students’ oral English ability) so that meant no pressure and I just played jeopardy with every single class to help them review 
    I don’t know how effective it was but the first graders got a 92% on their English mid-term and I’d like to think the game of Simon Says I played with them helped them at least remember their face from their ear
  On a whole I’m not sure how the school did
  We’re not the best school in Shenzhen but we’re not the worst, we’re good but we can be better and I see our staff trying hard every day trying to make their school the best school and it’s really inspiring
   I do have some responsibilities though
  Every day at the start of morning exercises (where every single in the school lines up on the basketball courts) I teach them every day oral English
  
  
  For example, this last Tuesday I taught them
   A: What happened?
   B: I don’t know
   I taught them this because they always want to say “I don’t know” when I ask them an English question so at least now they can say “I don’t know” in English
  Then I’m also in charge of fostering a cross-cultural partnership with an elementary school in an English speaking country
  
  
  Basically, we’re looking for a school to start a partnership with and it’s really cool so if you know any elementary school that wants to start a partnership with a Chinese elementary school, let me know because I have some good ideas
  
  
  Food can drives where the loser has to send the winner something that represents their country (like if we lost we would send you a giant 中国结)
  Sending teachers or administrators over to your country to learn how you teach students and you can send teachers to our school to learn more about the Chinese education system and Chinese pedagogy
  (this is a joke) Share recipes (I’ve learned how to make really good braised eggplant since I’ve been here)， postcards, etc. (teachers or students)