Fun on my first day of class

• So now I'm in charge of teaching 16 different classes of 45-50 different students (that's 720-800 students whose names I will memorize...ha) spoken English and I will also teach two classes of English corner
• So I had pictures, but I gave my camera to somebody and instead of deleting the one picture she wanted to delete (she didn't speak English) she actually deleted every picture on my camera of my first day at school, so you'll just have to believe me
• Introduced myself to the principal
• So on Thursday afternoon I got to meet my new principal and he's a super nice guy who speaks English a lot better than I can speak Chinese and his first question was when I can start
• Me: Tomorrow
• Principal: OK
• We had a full-fledged conversation in English, all the kids pointed and stared at me in my western-style suit and tie, and I got to meet all of the other English teachers who asked me if I was married yet
• Introduced myself to the school
• It was actually quite impressive, all 900 students of the school march out onto the school grounds in the morning in perfectly formed lines, and I got to introduce myself to them.
• I was ridiculously nervous because seeing all of those children in perfectly formed lines reminded me of Children of the Corn a little bit (like they would rip me to shreds if my grammar was wrong) 
• My instructions were simple so I just made a really simple introducition
• Hello
• My name is Mr. Spencer
• I'm fine. Thank you
• I like reading books
• I like China
• I like women
• I have a mother. I have a father. I have no wife. I have no children.(to which my principal later told me-that's a good thing)
• My first class
• I showed them pictures of a mansion in Atlanta and told them, "Yeah this is my house in Atlanta"

• 

• Then I said, "Ah, I'm just kidding!" and showed them a picture of my dad's actual house
• Then we played the "Stand up" game 
• The stand up game is simple, I say, "Stand up if..." and say "you like dogs", "you're American", etc.
• It's really good because then you can see how good they're listening skills are
• Plus it's always great to see how other kids treat kids who heard me wrong (get a sense of classroom culture and what not), plus I like to say, "Oh, so you're American eh?" to my Chinese students who stand up and are definitely not American
• Funny moment 1:
• Stand up if you're Chinese (all students stand up)
• Stand up if you're American (4 students who are definitely not American stand up)
• Funny moment 2
• Stand up if you like dogs (maybe 20 students stand up)
• Stand up if you are a dog (the same 4 students who were "American" stand up)
• Funny moment 3
• Stand up if you are a boy (all the boys and 2 girls stand up and the boys make fun of those two girls in a lighthearted way)
• Stand up if you like boys (3 boys stand up and get mercilessly made fun of by those previously mentioned girls)
• Funny moment 4
• Stand up if you're mom has a car (a few students stand up)
• Stand if you're mom is a car (15 students stand up and I just look at them...smile really big for and laugh for 10 seconds and then tell them what that means in Chinese)
•  After I told them, it took them maybe a millisecond to sit down